20 Comebacks for Being Late

It is an undeniable truth that you might’ve been late in one function or another. It could be at your workplace, on a dinner date, or just at a friendly gathering.

Being late to functions is not a good attitude if it becomes recurrent, but it may not be a big issue if you’re seldom late to events.

However, there is a chance someone might’ve said something about your lateness. In most cases, such a comment is not usually welcoming as the person might want to make you feel remorseful for being late.

To achieve this, he or she would say things that are seemingly condescending enough to get at you. You only let the person win if you show remorse and/or say little to nothing about their comment.

But in this article, I will be taking you on a couple of comebacks you can throw for being late. Read on to learn more!

Best 20 Comebacks for Being Late

Having something to say when you are late doesn’t mean you are right. Sometimes, all that is needed from you is a calming apology.

You will only need savage replies when the person who talks about your lateness does that with a derogatory tone, fashioned to make you feel bad.

I’m glad to tell you; you can be the person’s spoiler alert and you’ll need the best comebacks to do that such as the ones below.

  1. Better to arrive late than arrive messed up
  2. Would you rather have me come early and nerdy?
  3. I guess you should embrace the moment and let go of the past
  4. I’m sorry for being late, I sort of trust my alarm clock more than most humans
  5. I won’t be surprised if coming late pisses you off, because everything else does
  6. I am not late, you just came too early to judge me
  7. Oops, I’m late. I’d always known heroes are never on time
  8. I’m not late. The bell rang too early
  9. I haven’t been paid since I’ve been coming early. I’m trying that out with being late
  10. I got pretty overzealous trying to make my hair. I didn’t want to look shabby like you
  11. Sorry I’m late, my dryer got obsessed with my pant
  12. Stop bugging me for being late, at least I’m not late like your husband
  13. Your mom wouldn’t get off me on time
  14. I got here late because I spent time thinking about how to handle your ugly face
  15. I guess I’ll make up by leaving late
  16. Better late than not ever showing up
  17. The early worm gets eaten first
  18. I want to ignore you, but that would piss me off
  19. This won’t happen next time, that’s not a promise though
  20. I had a hard time rethinking my passion for this job

The following section of this post is the part where I will give the details on each of the afore-stated lines of a comeback.

Better To Arrive Late Than Arrive Messed Up

This is the first line of a comeback in this post and it is a fine defense statement. I can easily picture the scenario of this comeback to be in an office space, where the employer asks his employee why he or she was late to work.

You could make use of this line of comeback if you, unfortunately, come late to work. This line of comeback asserts that you should come late to work than you came to work early but in a messed up state.

From the look of things, this is a good response or comeback that can convince your boss without you having to do much work. The only hard job there is to have the effrontery to talk and say this line of a comeback.

Would You Rather Have Me Come Early and Nerdy?

Just like the previous line of a comeback, this line also addresses the issue of being early but unprepared.

You can also use this in the workplace, as it can serve as a good excuse for being late to work.

Every company has its policies and punctuality is one of them. Meaning that as a worker, you need to be early to work to stay in sync with the company’s efficiency rating.

Meanwhile, there’s also a place for professionalism and preparedness in the scope of these policies. This means that since you’re coming to work on time, you should do that prepared and concerning all professional precedents of the company.

This line of comeback shows that it is better to be late and prepared than to be early and nerdy i.e. unprofessional.

Although this thesis is a good one, it is invalid if the act of being late is continuous and recurrent.

I Guess You Should Embrace the Moment and Let Go of the Past

Do you have a fellow worker or attendant in a function who is bent on getting you worked up for being late and you want to shut them up? If so, you can adopt this line of a comeback as a good way to achieve that.

Undoubtedly, by the time the person brings up the late issue, you might’ve been 20mins late already. This automatically means you’re late but it is already in the past. If this is so, there’s no need for the person to bring it up again as it is already a past event.

With this comeback, you’re asserting that the person shouldn’t bring it up as it is already in the past and he or she should let it go.

I’m Sorry for Being Late, I Sort of Trust My Alarm Clock more than Most Humans

There is no better sarcastic way of voicing out your distrust when it comes to humans if not this line of a comeback. This comeback features an apology for being late and also more on the trust you have in your alarm clock than in humans.

Assuming the person who you directed this to is your fellow worker, it means you place more value on your alarm clock than the person. It further illustrates how less important the person is, compared to your alarm clock.

I’m sure the person would prefer you call them an idiot than this comeback because it shows them just how useless they are to you.

I Won’t Be Surprised if Coming Late Pisses You Off, Because Everything Else Does

If you have someone that always picks at you and does everything possible to get under your skin, then you can prepare this comeback for such a person.

This comeback suggests that the person finds fault in everything you, do and uses it against you. If this is so, there will be nothing different if you come late to an event in which they would be also present.

It is a more perfect time for them to recount how insolent you’ve been with life. But you and I know that keeping quiet while someone roasts you is not the ideal thing to do.

So you can use this comeback to shut the person up even before he or she starts thinking of the best way to roast you.

I Am Not Late, You Just Came Too Early to Judge Me

Comebacks for Being Late

There’s always a place for denial in this case because you might want to divert your lateness to something else. With this line of a comeback, you’re shifting the blame for why you’re late from yourself to the person who might query you for being late.

In this scenario, your reason for being late is the other person’s early show-up. Had it been the person who didn’t come too early to judge you, you wouldn’t be late.

Oops, I’m late. I’d always Knew Heroes Are Never on Time

If you have been seeing comic movies or superhero acts on screen, you will notice this usual move of most heroes in movie scenes. They usually come late or will I say after the villains must’ve caused noticeable damage.

You can take the stand in this case as a hero, who comes late to rescue people. You can use this line to suggest that you’re a hero and that says why you’re late.

I’m not late. The Bell Rang Too Early

This is another line of comeback that explains why you might be late. In this scenario, you’re blaming the bell. This comeback pictures that the scenario of the statement is that of a school setting.

It could be that you came late to school and you are being questioned by probably a teacher or a supervisor. To avert the punishments accompanied by being late, you can use this line of a comeback to stage an excuse.

I Haven’t Been Paid Since I’ve been Coming Early. I’m trying that out with Being Late

No one gets paid for coming early to functions. Although being punctual comes with the advantage of being recognized as a timely person, there’s no sign that you will get paid for that.

In other ways, you’re saying that you want to try out being late to see if there’s a payment attached to it. This sounds funny, but it is a good sarcastic comeback that you can use when you’re late.

I Got Pretty Overzealous Trying To Make My Hair. I Didn’t Want To Look Shabby Like You

Throwing shades at the person who tries to question being late is not a bad move after all. It is just you being able to shift the blame from you to another person who might want you to feel remorseful about being late.

Sorry I’m Late, My Dryer Got Obsessed with My Pant

This is a pretty good excuse that you can put up for being late. The obsession which your dryer has over your pant is a metaphorical expression that means that your pant got stuck in your dryer.

This means that you were late because you couldn’t get your pant out of the dryer on time.

Stop Bugging Me for being late, at least I’m not late like Your Husband

There’s room for a savage response for anyone who questions you for being late. This line of comeback is a slight warning to the person who queries to stop doing so, while you assert that you’re not as late as the person’s husband.

From this statement, you can deduce that the questioner is a married woman with a deceased husband.

Your Mom Wouldn’t Get Off Me on Time

Sometimes, comebacks come with really hurtful statements that can make the recipient emotionally imbalanced. In this case, you’re pointing at the person’s mom as being the reason why you’re late.

This comes out as an unrealistic reason, but it is just one of the ways comebacks are constructed to bring a soothing pain to the recipient.

I Got Here Late Because I Spent Time Thinking about How to Handle Your Ugly Face

When it comes to the business of throwing shades at people, you should consider me elite.

This is another smooth savage statement that suggests that you were late because you had to plan on how to deal with seeing the ugly face of the person who might’ve been questioned for being late.

I guess I’ll make up by Leaving Late

Comebacks for Being Late

Spreading hate and disgust with your comebacks shouldn’t always be the only solution to problems like this. Sometimes, you have to add sounding nice and considerate to your bucket list.

You can achieve that by using this line of a comeback to show how you intend to make up for being late.

Better Late Than Not Ever Showing Up

In an actual sense, this statement is more of a universal truth than it is a comeback. You can use it to prove that being late is better than not even appearing at the event or occasion.

The Early Worm Gets Eaten First

Parables can come in handy as a way of conveying your comebacks for being late. The early worm gets eaten first is a perfect example of what happens when someone comes early. Indirectly, this shows that being late has its advantage.

I Want To Ignore You, but That Would Piss Me Off

Many people advocate ignoring a person as one of the nicest ways of averting a battle of words or even picking up enmity with someone over your flaw of being late. But you can use this comeback to prove why ignoring the person isn’t a good decision.

This Won’t Happen Next Time, That’s Not a Promise Though

With this line, you’re making a plea that you won’t be late and at the same time, you’re also showing it is not a promise. Promises are hard to keep and when you realize, you’ll be able to juggle easily through hurdles.

I Had a Hard Time Rethinking My Passion for This Job

At some point in the life of every career person, there’s usually a time of sober reflection. Within this period, the person questions everything about his or her life including their job.

You can capitalize on this as the reason why you were late. An understandable listener, be it your employer or supervisor will understand and probably grant you a pass.


This is the point where I will draw the curtain on this subject matter, which addresses comebacks that you can use for being late.

While most of these comebacks are condescending as per the tone of the questioner, others are more understandable and subtle to address the issue calmly.

Do not forget to hit the share icon before closing this page and also make sure you employ the right comeback for your preferred circumstance.

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