If you are perceived to be old-fashioned or conventional, then chances are someone is going to call you a Square.
The usage of this slang dates back to the American jazz community of the 1940s, where people out of touch with musical trends are called Square.
When someone calls you this, it should be considered an offensive remark to suggest that you are boring.
But keep in mind that the person calling you square may be doing so to manipulate you into doing something you don’t wish to do.
For instance, the person might have called you square to challenge your position and undermine your decision so that you will change your stance.
The next time someone calls you square, use any of these responses to give a snappy comeback and make them feel defeated:
1. Better to be a square today and around tomorrow
The next someone calls you a square, you respond with this witty reply which would send the idea that you have a better future than the person.
By giving this response, it also means that the person is wasting his precious time on frivolous activities while you are busy building your career.
2. You are going to regret saying that when you start working for me
People who are called square are considered intelligent, selectively introverted, and perhaps, bright.
When someone calls you square, you can use this idea to paint the narrative that you have a promising future ahead because you stick to your values.
3. Fifth grade must have been the best three years of your life
This response best suits a situation whereby the person has called you square because he or she perceives you to be too engrossed with a study that you barely create time to engage with them on adventurous activities that may appear unnecessary to you.
4. Wow… isn’t that 1950s era talking?
As cited earlier, calling someone a square as an insult dates back to the 1940s. In other words, back then, if you called someone a square, it meant they didn’t understand jazz, which means they were out of touch with current trends.
So for someone to use the term in this present age, you can use it to make a joke about the person. The contemporary word is “nerd”
5. Well, Keep in mind that squares can have very sharp corners
This alliteration is used as one of the best responses when someone tells you that you are a square because it can mean two things.
First, it sends the idea that you can get hostile with them if they use any other offensive word on you. It also establishes the impression that you have your unique way of unwinding as opposed to how they think you should live your life.
6. Let’s see who the square is in 15 years, pothead
This is a smart response to give someone who calls you a square because it makes them feel like a failure in the future.
If the person had called you such because you refuse to engage with them in, say, parties, and preferred to study, then this response will go well. It always works
7. Yeah, I got good grades. What are you going to do about it?
Calling someone a square is mostly used among students. So if this is the situation, chances are the person had said this out of jealousy that you are thriving academically and missing out on their kind of ‘fun’ so, the best thing you can do in such a situation is to rub it on their face that you are better than them.
8. Square? What decade are you from?
Again, you now know that square is an old saying from the 60s and 70s. so, the person choosing to use that word must mean that they are archaic in thinking. You can use this idea to stick it to them.
If they are as contemporary as they think, they should use modern words like uncool, nerd, or weird.
9. Better than being a dumb triangle
Now, you have used another shape here, but it has no actual significance. The main point of this response is that you have labeled them as dumb. With this response, they will feel defeated and it will keep them in an awkward position.
10. Oh really? What are your grades (insert name)? You’re such a circle!
When someone calls you a square, you can take advantage of their poor performance in the area where you are thriving and rub it on their face.
The person who had called you square had shot himself or herself on the foot for comparing you to a shape. Now, you will use the circle (zero) in their grades to describe them as well.
11. You need to get used to squares ‘cos the way you’re headed, you’ll be living in a cardboard box soon
This is another smart response that always works whenever someone calls you square. With this response, you are ridiculing the lifestyle of the person, and emphasizing that they will lie on the bed they are currently laying with the way they are living.
It makes them rethink their frivolous desires.
12. Who’s gonna be square when you work for me?
When someone says you are square, they may want you to see it as a shameful thing for being too engrossed with work or study and missing out on other things they assume to be ‘fun’ or a side distraction.
So when you give this response, you instantly remind them of the fruit of your labor and how they’d miss out in the future due to their ignorance.
13. And what are you? An irregular polygon?
When you call them an irregular polygon, you are shifting the conversation from you to them. In a way, this can be interpreted as a body-shaming insult if it applies to the persona of the one who had called you a square.
The person had started an offensive conversation about shapes, now you are taking the bull by the horn by making them the subject of ridicule.
14. I’m cool with that
When you show someone that you don’t care about their opinion, they become bitter that you are not obliging as they expected.
Remember that the person had called you a square to manipulate you into doing something you don’t want to do. So, when you say you are cool with being a square it discourages them from cajoling you further.
15. Why does that sound like you’re jealous of my personality?
In most cases, a person would call someone square because they envy the person’s stance on some things.
So when you pose this question, you are effortlessly painting the narrative that the person had called your square from the position of being jealous of your type of person.
16. No I’m a human, Are you asking for the square root in maths?
This is another hilarious, yet smart way to tell the person that they are dumb for calling you a square. You are going to intentionally pretend that the person is mistaken for asking the meaning of square.
So, this will make the person sound stupid, and further attempts to explain what they mean by calling you square will make them sound more stupid.
17. And someday, when I’m signing your paycheck, I will be a cube.
This is another snappy comeback you can give to someone who calls you a square. By saying this to the person, you are equally making a joke of them and insinuating that in years to come, they wouldn’t be in a position to call you a square any longer, given the way they are living their life now. So they are not the ones that will feel like missing out.
18. You are only just noticing this about me now?
When you give this reply, it shows that you don’t care about their observations and opinion of you. It helps you to sound confident and proud about who you are, thereby jeopardizing their intentions or motive for calling you a square.
19. Unlike you, I’m smart enough to set intentional boundaries
Being called a square, if you think about it, should be considered a compliment in some context.
This is because the person is unknowingly acknowledging that you are in control of your life and would not allow peer pressure to do something u, like the way they do.
20. You can’t succeed in manipulating me
You must identify why the person who had called you a square in the first place. If the person intended to make you feel like you are missing out, then you can stick it to them that they did not succeed in manipulating you into something you do not want to do.
21. You don’t know me
This short, simple response will shut them off because it shows that they are only calling you that because they don’t know you.
No matter how close you are to the person, saying this will make them feel distant and guilty about calling you a square. You have to match the response with a cold pitch and sound like you don’t even care about what they think of you.
22. Stupid people don’t live long and there is nothing wrong with being normal
This is an abstract clever and snappy insult you can give to someone immediately after they call you square. When you say this, you are indirectly telling them that you don’t give a shit if they see you as a square or not. It also makes you come off bold and confident.
23. Unlike you, I’d rather be myself than follow approval-seeking behaviors
One of the likely reasons why the person must have called you square is because you have refused to tag along in doing things that you consider against your moral or ethical values.
When you choose to remain who you are, you will be admired in the long run for standing your ground. You are not a people-pleaser.
24. Selectively intense introverts do amazing things
This is a witty quote to give someone immediately they call you a square. It is a smart way to justify your personality even when you see things from an opposite perspective.
25. Whatever floats your boat
When you say this, it is similar to saying “say whatever you want to, do no not care” when you show that you do not care about their opinion, they will be discouraged and back down anyway.
26. As they say, haters gonna hate!
There is nothing you can do about it. People would always say something about you. It is in your position to let them know that they did not succeed in getting under your skin.
You should say this in a tone that will best communicate that you are bothered and less concerned.
27. That says a lot about you than it does about me
Even though the remark does not indicate anything about them, saying this after someone calls you a square will make them start to think about their personality and how it may relate to calling you a square. It is a smart way to make them regret calling that name.
28. Let’s see where being round will lead you to
They may be round, and you may be square. But you need to let them know that you don’t see any deal breaker in that.
29. Frankly, my dear, I don’t really care
Again, this is telling them outright that even though they call you something worse, as long as you are staying true to yourself, you don’t give a damn.
30. I hope you find yourself in a better place soon
The next time someone calls you a square and you tell them this, it makes the person begin to think about their lifestyle and how yours might be better than theirs after all
The common connotative meaning for people calling others square, especially about students, is to imply that they are boring, rule-abiding, conventional, and old-fashioned.
If you are in this situation, remind yourself that you are living your life as you want to and not as some people would like you to.
As mentioned earlier, calling a person square is one of the tactics people use to get them to do something they don’t want to do. So using any of the above comebacks would make them feel defeated.
Again, you should not let people get to you by what they say. No matter what they call you for maintaining your values, just think about your future and think about how you will go somewhere and they won’t.