There is a line between acting tough and being tough. Most psychologists will say it is acting tough and being mentally strong.
In this article, I will be giving you examples of how people act tough and show signs of a weak man. Ready?
5 Examples of people acting tough
People who act tough pretend they can do it all
People who act tough pretend that they can handle anything, they can do everything in the world, like nothing is too hard for them.
Don’t get me wrong, it is good to have a good amount of self-confidence but when you exaggerate your abilities, you will find that in the challenges you can do nothing. It was all just words.
Here it is the words that are the problem, you can be stranded and have no way to get out of the mess you put yourself in. This leads to depression eventually.
For example, Dan is an athlete with myopia. That means he has to use glasses unlike other runners and because he wants to be seen as someone capable, as someone tough, he tries to run without his glasses.
Finally, he is chosen for a competition against schools. Everyone has so much faith in him because it is a big competition and they want him to win.
Well, he loses because he is not able to see without his glasses. He is a good runner but not being able to see as he runs into someone else’s lane and so he is disqualified.
If he didn’t act like his glasses were some sign of weakness, he would have won and he probably won’t feel the need to prove anything.
People who act tough argue all the time
You see them trying to prove one point or the other. If they are not arguing, they are seething over an argument, or warming up to one.
And the funny thing is, they try to find something to argue about it. It may be something tough or confusing or matter of fact, but whatever it is they are there till they have worn everyone out with their endless talk.
Why do they do this? They measure their strength in how long they can fight. In this case, the fight is not about physical strength.
It is in eloquence or long they can shout out what they believe no matter how biased it may be.
For example, you will see in a dime discussion like who is the best NBA player or who is going to win America’s got talent, they would state who they want to win and why then slowly they could crush your points and make them sound like lies.
In discussions that require facts, even if they are wrong, they would oppose the truth with excuses like the information is outdated or it is biased or controversial, and so on.
You know these kinds of people who can turn anything into an argument. They are tiresome and soon everyone will try to avoid them.
People who act tough disobey orders
This is someone who is not tough, pretending to be tough by being a rebel. This is common.
By breaking rules and disobeying orders, they receive attention and that is something that someone who pretends to be tough wants, whether the attention is negative or positive. They equate attention to validation.
If people are talking about them then it means that they are loved or at least accepted. Also by disobeying rules, they are seen as rebels and people who you stay away from and be afraid of.
They equate that fear with power and soon they are harassing people and being nuisances.
Deep down they probably just want to be recognized or known for something but they go about it the wrong way.
Well, that way never ends well and soon you see them in a juvenile center in prison for some flimsy crime that could have been avoided if they just tried to get famous the old-fashioned way.
Love doesn’t come through fear, and acting tough through rebellion shows that you are uncivilized, not that you are a strong person.
Someone who is mentally strong follows the rules and makes the most of it to their advantage. That’s how you show you are strong.
People who act tough are very hard on others
I am not talking about motivational speaker’s encouragement or your gym teacher’s pushing. I am talking about giving them a hard time.
They are mean and when you ask them about it, they will say they are trying to toughen them up.
In all this, they feel they wield power and by doing so, by not showing affection and acting indifferent or like they do not care, they are tough.
What they are doing is just hiding how they feel. No one is going to hate you for being honest about what you feel. People who are more open about how they feel are more liked than those who pretend to be indifferent.
Why? Those who tend to be indifferent do it because it makes them seem unfazed by life and some people admire it, the illusion of having it all under control.
Those who are honest though show that they are human and while they go through the same things we do, they also have it all in control.
This singular difference tells you that the same result can be reached without being fake.
People who act tough create an air of superiority
There is nothing more irritating than pride. Pride makes someone who is normally nice a monster because of their behavior towards everything changes.
Someone Who acts tough creates this air of superiority because of the things that they are good at.
They might be good at swimming and be in charge of the swimming team or maybe they are in a position of power or the other. What they do is try to use that one thing to build their whole lives.
The reason we all hate this is that we see past all of it and we know that they are just pretending. That aside, there is nothing else that makes their lives or them as great as they describe it to be.
They think that creating all that about themselves or highlighting that attribute about them, it makes them so great and so tough.
Well, it doesn’t. A lot of things make a person and using your skill or talent or position to define yourself or value yourself is wrong. You are more than skills or jobs.
You should see yourself for who you are, not what you are or what you can do. People who act tough don’t get this.
What are the signs of a weak man?
What makes a man weak? Here we are not talking about physical strength. We are talking about the mind. How do you know someone who is mentally weak?
Let’s look into that:
They indulge in self-pity
Self-pity is very wrong. When you pity people you are encouraging them to do more stupid things because you are absolving them of the blame and not letting them take any responsibility for whatever happened to them.
That doesn’t mean you should not sympathize with them but it should not be to a point that they start to go into self-pity. Self-pity is different from sympathy even to yourself. Self-pity is exaggerated unhappiness.
You complain endlessly about your problems and how things are hard for you but you do nothing to fix them. Sympathy is consoling yourself about your problems and finding a solution.
Like a friend of mine rightly put it, if someone dies, self-pity how you mourn the person like it is the end of the world.
Sympathy is how your friends help you get through the grief while allowing you to mourn without killing yourself.
They love to play the blame game
A weak person never takes responsibility for anything. They would rather blame others for their mistakes and the situation of things around them than do something about it.
A weak person does this because they do not have courage. They do not want to fail but they are not willing to try so when anything goes wrong they want to lay it on someone else instead of finding a way to fix the issue at hand.
For example, if you are in a group with a weak-minded person, they play their part halfheartedly, hoping that someone would do their part of the work for them.
They find the least amount of work to do and if there is a flop or a little mistake they get defensive and lay it on the rest of the group.
It is difficult to work with a weak person because of this. They don’t have the same goals, dreams, drive, and enthusiasm as you so it makes even the simplest of tasks a chore.
They do not have a certain say
A weak person never has an opinion of their own. They listen to what others are saying and try to choose sides without really thinking about it.
They also let others make their own decisions for them and they try to find vague points why they should go along with those decisions or choices.
If you ever confront a weak person about their choice, you will hear them saying other people’s words.
They are not necessarily shy or afraid of what others will say, they don’t just have a mind of their own and are not confident in their own choices.
I once asked a girl her opinion on a picture that I liked so much. She asked me in reply what she was supposed to think. That is a clear example of a weak-minded person.
They like to be victims
Remember what I said about a weak person wallowing in self-pity? Well, they realize that they need to be victims to pity themselves and have others also pity them.
You will find them in most situations, getting into trouble, throwing tantrums, issuing threats, and after all, they are going to cry like babies so that all they said can be used against you.
They believe that they get validation and live from pity. The truth is, it is not the same thing, and playing victim will make people see that you are a weak person who can not rise above small matters.
In time, you would have no one around.
They are not resilient
I don’t like being around people who can not work for what they want, who are not full of drive, and who lack resilience.
They give up at the slight sign of a problem and keep retelling that sob story to other people.
They never last long at anything and they are hard to work with because they want to drop what they are working on when they have the slightest discomfort.
Here is an example: my cousin refused to work in our family business because there was no air conditioning. It wasn’t that hot and there were fans but she refused to work. Do you see what I mean?
They focus on what can not be controlled
There are so many things that are above our control. Worrying over them can not change it so you just have to wait for it to play out knowing that whatever happens, you can always tweak it to your favor.
A weak person focuses on things that are above them. In doing that, they lose control of what they can control, or they let others control it for them.
The reason they do this is so they look like victims and it helps them to avoid making decisions. This way they can not take the blame for what they did not do.
It is a twisted mistake and what this does is that in the long run, such a person will always be confused both about the things they can control and the things they can not control.
So from all that has been said, which are you, a weak person, someone who acts tough, someone who is tough? You decide using all the points above.